Worse Than I Thought?

I had an appointment yesterday with my gastroenterologist. I'm actually moving out of state next month, so I decided I wanted to tell him this in person, request my chart, and just ask a few last questions. Even though he has helped me a lot, I think this is a great opportunity to get a second opinion without making it seem that way.

For some reason I've been really nervous about going to this appointment, so I asked my husband to come with me--it was the first time he had ever come.

When the doctor came in, I told him what I was there for and also asked him how long he thinks I could go without the dilation. What he told us was some-what alarming to my husband. He said that he doesn't think one month would hurt, but that if I want a chance at a healthy, normal life, it would be best to get the dilation as soon as possible. He also actually addressed achalasia as a "disease". This was a first for me. I guess it never occurred to me that I have a disease. It sounds weird and scary.

My husband was so overwhelmed by all of this. He was upset with me because I apparently made this out to be "no big deal". He cried all night long. I feel kind of guilty for making him come with me, but I promised him that I would take better care of myself and make sure that I always take my Reglan before each meal.

I guess I wasn't treating this like it was that big of a deal. The worse part about having this "disease" is that no one has ever heard of it. What aggravates me the most is when people associate it with the only gastrointestinal problem they are familiar with, which is acid reflux or GERD. "Oh, is it because of the reflux?" No offense to them. I know they are just trying to be caring and relate, but I can't stand it when they say that. This is why I've created this blog. I just want more people to know about achalasia and the trials and tribulations we sufferers go through each day.

What To Do

Lately I just don't know what to do. I have been feeling much, much better since the botox injections. I have not regurgitated since February 27; plus, I actually gained about 10 pounds--a little depressing, but good in the long run.

Last Friday night after I ate dinner, I had these terrible pains in my upper front abdomen on the right side underneathe my rib cage. It was excruciating! It finally stopped after I laid down. After doing some research, I was beginning to think that maybe I had gallstones. Of course, my doctor automatically thinks it is spasms due to my achalasia.

He keeps trying to convince me to get the dilation and I am trying to put it off until I graduate next month. Plus, I already owe a good bit of money for my lovely 3 days and 2 nights stay at the hospital. What a vacation, let me tell ya. I could've gone on a cruise for that amount of money. Heck, probably 3 cruises.

I wish he would just come out and make the decision for me! Lauren, you need the dilation now or Lauren, it can wait a few more months. I hate making decisions!